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6 Anal Foreplay Tips You Probably Can’t Live Without

Your warm-up before you work out, and you do anal foreplay before you go for anal sex.


pop quiz! Adding anal play to your sexual repertoire means something is going up to someone’s butt.


False! You can totally engage in anal foreplay without having to have penetration of any kind go up you or your partner’s bum. Whether you’re looking to change things up, or just want to take your time with backdoor foreplay before you do dive into anal sex, anal foreplay can be a super pleasurable addition to your sex life. The good thing about anuses is that everybody’s got one, so you can give and receive to your heart’s content if you so choose.


Is ~butt stuff~ something you talk about with your partner?


Nowadays, anal sex is no longer the ~taboo~ subject it once was, which is a good thing! Lots of women who’ve been there and done that say it’s a welcome addition to their sexual repertoire. But just like you must walk before you can run, you must have some sort of anal foreplay before you go for the full monty of anal sex. Or, you know, you can do butt play and leave it at that forever, because it’s your booty and you make the rules.


You (hopefully) already know the basics: ALWAYS use lube, never put something that was in your butt in your mouth or vagina, and butt plugs are your friend. But there’s so much more to know about anal play, and so here, several sexperts break down their best anal foreplay tips for both first-timers and experienced butt travelers. Happy butt stuff!


  1. Treat anal like a door, literally.

Foreplay is so important because you have to “ring the doorbell” before entering, explains Isharna Walsh, founder/creator of Coral, a sexual wellness app. “Massage and warm up the anus before entering anything inside,” she says. Be a good guest (even if it’s your own bootyhole), and don’t just Kool-Aid Man yourself through the door.


  1. Prep a “resting station” for any toys or lube that you might be using.

Some people who use toys learn to have a small handkerchief close by, so they can rest their toy on a “safe” spot when they aren’t using it, explains Angela Watson, of DoctorClimax.com. Having little details like this worked out ahead of time can give you more freedom to enjoy the experience and not stress about little things.


  1. Try Sacral Massage.

It’s worth it to take 15-20 minutes giving the receiving partner a sacral massage (aka the portion of the lower back just above the butt crack), says Walsh. “The muscles and nerve endings in the sacrum extend to the whole pelvic girdle and can help release tension,” she adds. Plus, massages always feel good and anything relaxing is a bonus, always.


  1. Stimulate around the anal opening first.

“Having your back door be a part of sexual play does not mean you need to have anal sex,” says Gigi Engle, sexpert for Womanizer. While internal stimulation can be great too, “you can achieve just as much pleasure without ever putting anything into the anus,” explains Engle. “Massage or lick around the anus,” she adds, as it’s full of nerve endings that can provide pleasure in and of itself.


  1. Don’t neglect your clit!

“Having clitoral stimulation is super important during anal play because it helps a vulva-owner to relax and become fully aroused — both critical steps in enjoying butt stuff,” according to Engle. You can try a traditional vibrator, or go for a suction toy like the Womanizer Liberty, which Engle recommends.


  1. Try a heated lubricant.


Warming lube can help heighten pleasure and make you even more comfortable at the moment. “The heat that is created actually helps to bring blood flow to the area and help increase the stimulation to the pleasure receptors in the rectum/anus,” explains Dr. Niket Sonpal, MD, of Brookdale Hospital Medical Center. The active ingredient in these heated lubricants is propylene glycol, says Dr. Sonpal, which is the same substance used in Fireball Whiskey. Some other brands use capsaicin, aka the active ingredient found in peppers. In either case, heated lubricants should be fine for both anal and vaginal use (not in the same sex session, just like, you don’t need to buy a separate, dedicated warming lube for your butt ONLY, is what we mean). Just be careful when touching your eyes, Dr. Sonpal warns! K-Y makes a warming lubricant that’s readily available that Dr. Sonpal recommends or Sliquid Organics’ warming formula.


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